Select Page

Here’s my basic creative process. Fill my head with information until my brain is full and a story falls out. Then fill it up again. I spend a lot of time filling up my head. 

Jack London said, “You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.” I say, screw the muse. I’ll find my own inspiration. Here’s something I found:

There’s a statue of a giraffe in front of the Dallas Zoo.

That’s not a big deal. It’s not even 70 feet tall.

Screen Shot 2014-11-07 at 3.12.01 PM

Pictured here: An unimpressive giraffe. 

What is a big deal is that it is the fifth tallest statue in the US.

And that sucks.

Here’s the ranking: 

Statue of Liberty

Our Lady of the Rockies

National Monument to the Forefathers

Golden Driller (Sadly, a former ad gimmick)

Big, Stupid Giraffe

 

 

It’s sad. I’m right down the road from the 5th biggest statue in the country and it’s not even a thing.

But you know who can build a statue? Commies.

The Soviets and the Chineese—man, could they build a cool statue.

Here’s one of a giant angry man at the Brest Fortress Memorial in Belarus.

Screen Shot 2014-11-07 at 3.06.49 PM

Picture here: Soviet disgust at your puniness.

 

From what I gather, the Brest Fortress was the Soviet Union’s Alamo during World War II. To honor those who defended Brest, they carved this mean looking bastard out of stone.

 

This is what we need here. We need a pissed off Davy Crocket towering behind the Alamo, standing in defiance over the mission that means so much to Texans and confused Americans who forget that Texas was it’s own country.

 

What’s there now? I think it’s a mall.

 

pics from google earth