I like coffee. I like brands. As coffee is the most commoditized product on the planet, the brand becomes everything. Lately, I discovered a ton of cool and quirky coffee brands out there. So many so that I’m almost convinced that a great coffee brand may not even need to make coffee at all. But I’ll be checking them out and telling you what I think all the same.   

The brew: Koffee Kult Dark Roast

Best for writing: Twisted tales. Maybe about cults or something.

I’ve said before, I like simple. And the Koffee Kult brand is as simple as it gets.

Koffee Kult has white text on a black bag. The only branding is the name Koffee Kult and a tagline that says Be One of Us. That’s it. Very simple.

The packaging is so basic that it reminds me of the Loblaws No Name brand back in Canada in the 80’s. These were yellow containers with black Helvetica type that stated what was inside and nothing else. If it was peanut butter, it just said peanut butter. (Okay, it also said beurre d’arachide (which kind of sounds like Spider Butter) because Quebec)

They now have beer. Looks refreshing.

 

So that’s what the brand reminds me of. An 80’s Canadian brand literally called No Name. (That had to be the easiest copywriting project ever, by the way)

 

Okay, There is something besides the name. There is a squirrel.

This bag is worth one squirrel point.  Awesome. Why a squirrel? It doesn’t say. If you dig into their website, it still doesn’t say why a squirrel. But it does tell us that 1000 points is worth $5. Now, I like coffee. A lot. I probably drink more than most and certainly more than I should. And at the rate I drink coffee, I should have 1000 points in June of 2040. Can’t wait to get that $5. No wonder that damn squirrel is smiling.

As I said before, I’m trying new coffee as much for the branding as I am the coffee itself. But I still drink the coffee.

I got the Dark Roast and I’ll admit that this is some of the best coffee I’ve ever had at home.

Really, this stuff is good. I’ll be getting more

So, the branding is a little confusing. But shouldn’t any good cult raise a few questions? And I still don’t know what’s with the squirrel. But maybe I shouldn’t. Not until I’ve had a few rounds on the old e-meter and moved up few levels.

I’m not really in the market for a new cult but if the coffee is this good it may be worth attending an orientation.

Try it yourself

FREE AUDIOBOOK

I want to give you an audiobook.

It's a collection of short stories about time travel, alien invasions, selling homes in alternate dimensions, giant combiner robots, post-apocalyptic beagles and much more. And it's all read by the amazing Phil Thron.

It's yours when you sign up for my newsletter. 

You have Successfully Subscribed!